I guess I'm having a bad day.

You cannot be disappointed when people don't give you what you don't have courage to ask for

Your love will end up killing me

And I keep telling myself I haven't fallen for you, I'm not in love with you cuz my reality is too painful to be true

Just one song to make you fall in love.

I try to relax and unwind, try to silence my turning mind but these words just keep pouring out
You can't silence a troubled heart

And it's times like these I miss you most desperately. When I feel strange and like I don't even belong in my own skin. Cuz you make it make sense. You make me remember my song. You make me sit comfortable in my skin and my twister heart settle in my chest.

The outcry of my heart is to have yours next to mine. I can keep telling myself it's only a matter of time, but I promised never to lie to myself. I still can't work out how not to make this beauty a hell.

I cry through song, cuz my eyes have forgotten how to sing along.
My heart bleeds with the melody and I hold on for all I'm worth to the only thing holding me to this earth.

Every single fucking time I've put myself out there I've gotten hurt. I don't even think it's necessarily the people I love, but EVERYTHING else. Like the MOTHER FUCKING UNIVERSE DOESN'T WANT ME TO BE HAPPY AND ALL I'VE EVER TRIED TO DO IS BE A GOOD SISTER AND A FRIEND AND DAUGHTER AND I FUCKING FAIL MISERABLY AND ALL I WANT TO DO WITH MY LIFE IS HELP PEOPLE NOT EVER BE IN MY SITUATION OR FEEL AS SHITTY AS ME AND FUCKING EVERYTHING SPITES ME AND NOTHING IS WORKING OUT FOR ME PLEASE DEAR GOD TELL ME WHAT I'VE DONE WRONG. I know I'm a fuck up.